I always wonder what triggers kids to talk/ask about death out of the blue. Are they having nightmares? Seeing pictures here and there and wonder, "who is that and where are they?" I just don't know.
We've talked to Alexa (when she's asked) about death, and how my mom died (4 years ago - still can't believe its been that long) and is in heaven which is way up in the clouds. We were in the car yesterday morning on the way to day care and this is a snippet of our conversation. No idea what sparked her questions at 7:45 AM!
Alexa: Mom, where is your momma? Is Carole your momma? Everybody has a momma.
Me: Carole isn't my momma, Nana is my momma. Remember I told you she died when you were a really little baby?
Alexa: Oh, yeah, Nana. She died when I was little. I don't want anybody to die. I don't want to die. Why did she die?
Me: She got really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, sick and couldn't be fixed. No one is dying right now......
UGH. What do you say? This girl remembers everything. She has a mind like a sponge. How do you talk about it? I've looked at books and most books are written for a slightly older child. And I wonder, does this get easier, or does it get harder as they get older?
1 comment:
{{{{{HUGS}}}}} You know I've been there with Jack and it never gets easier. Sounds like you did exactly what she needed -- answered her questions matter-of-factly. I'm sure she'll revisit the whole concept again and again b/c it's so hard to understand, even for those of us who know what death means but hate to accept it. Alexa is such a beautiful, smart girl -- wouldn't your mother be so proud of the amazing girls you are raising?
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